It’s been six weeks since my last post. According to my original timeline, I should have completed the project five weeks ago. It was ten weeks ago that I found out about what happened to her. It’s been ten weeks since I learned my daughter had been the victim of a very serious physical assault at the hands of her then boyfriend. It’s been ten weeks since I felt remotely close to being “myself.”
He went to jail. My daughter is safe and recovering from the trauma. I have been through a lot in my life, but nothing as horrifying as what she went through. I wish I could have traded her places and spared her the pain. I have never felt so much rage or sorrow in my life. I have never experienced such deep feelings of utter futility and inadequacy.
On the other hand, I am in awe of Hannah’s resilience and at the way everyone has come forward to voice their support for her. I would like to thank the Salt Lake County D.A.’s office and the fine men and women of the South Jordan police department. This is the first time in my life that everyone has surpassed my expectations and acted on behalf of someone I loved to the best of their abilities.
Hannah and I would not have made it through these last ten weeks without the constant support from my parents, my siblings (especially Nan and Erika), our friends, and most of all, Hannah’s dad, Shaun.
Next week Hannah leaves for the summer away with my family. She’ll be spending time with people who love her and can help her to accomplish some of the goals she’s laid out for herself. I will be resuming my quest to “shuck the superfluous shit.” I will miss her terribly, and it may prove to be too much — who knows, maybe I’ll join her — but for now, I am happy for her. I am so proud of her. She is becoming the woman she was meant to become.
And to Hannah, I love you. Be safe. Be brave. Be joyful. — love, mom.